10 People We Would Love To See Slap Justin Bieber
Oh Biebs, sadly for him the general public are more emotional about the fact he didn’t get hurt, rather than feeling sorry for his pitiful little self when the story came out claiming he had been slapped.
This week, Empire Sports reported that the Bieb had gone ape sh*t at a West Hollywood Starbucks because the barista refused to serve him topless. LA Clippers player Blake Griffin apparently swooped in to save the day with a hearty thwack sending Justin to the floor. Hooray for Griffin! We should have thought about this more carefully when rejoicing with our loved ones and skipping down the streets to celebrate with the neighbours; this is the stuff of dreams and dreams rarely come true.
The world wept together as Gossip Cop went and ruined it for everyone by announcing the story to be fake.
Deciding that we liked being happy and the thought of Justin Bieber getting b*tch slapped. What better way is there to compensate learning that Justin didn’t get slapped than by conjuring up a wonderful list of people that we would like to see slap the young Canadian.
1. Mr T
You would definitely pity the fool!
2. David Haye
Imagine the joy upon seeing David connect with a Hayemaker!
3. The Rock
Sorry guys, this is totally unbeliebable (I’m sorry I just couldn’t resist)… Justin is WAY weedier than that.
4. He Who Shall Not Be Named
The Harry Potter films may take 556,012 hours of your life to watch, hours that you will never have back. However that time would be totally worth it if Biebs had the dark lord after him.
5. His Cell Mate From His Night In Prison
Regardless of driving offences, he should be locked up for crimes to music and damage to ears on an international scale.
6. Jared Padalecki
Ok, so this was just a great gif, but look at the satisfaction that slap would bring!
7. A Random Penis
Well he is a d*ckhead.
8. The Classic Self Slap
We hope that at some point he may realise just how much of a dick he has been and dish the pain out on himself. That failing it would have to be…
Now this one is doubles up friends.The first option is yourself; close your eyes and dream my dear, dear friends, for ecstasy lies within your mind. If you ever feel frustration, anger, or you just want something to brighten your day, dive into your imagination and pummel Justin Bieber. Whilst the second option is rather different. A world in which Benedict Cumberbatch has slapped Justin Bieber is a world in which the hashtag #cumberbitchslap exists, enough said.
The one person whose hand we would all love to see connect with the Biebs cheek.