Dance like nobody is watching - 5 of the best nightclub tracks - Xclusive Touch

Dance like nobody is watching – 5 of the best nightclub tracks

Xclusive Touch

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Dance like nobody is watching – 5 of the best nightclub tracks

We’ve all been there, stood next to the guy that shouts “Ohhhh tune!” everytime the DJ drops a new song and can feel our irritation rising. The smell from his underarms as he shows his appreciation to someone he can barely see almost overpowering us in every conceivable way but, to be fair to him, it is a massive tune. There are so many but here’s a list of just 5….

Ooh wee –  Mark Ronson ft. Ghostface Killah, Trife and the late, great Nate Dogg

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If you’ve never heard, or don’t like “Ooh Wee” then we can’t be friends. This track from 2003’s Here Comes The Fuzz contains everything that a great club track needs; it’s got the kind of groove that you couldn’t help but smile to if you walked through the doors just as it starts, the guest vocalists all play their part (especially in Nate Dogg’s verse which captures the song perfectly) and I doubt anyone has ever heard the start with joining in on the laid back “la, la, la”s at the very start.

Of course, Mark Ronson has a gift for great Hip-Hop production and picking out “Sunny” by Boney M and funking up the already groovy-as-hell sample was never going to fail on a track like this. It’s the kind of song that will only herald a good night.


In the Club – 50 Cent

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Ok, so this still appeals to the 14 year old kid inside of me that tried to get the approval of the football team but, damn, if I don’t shout out like the guy in my intro every time this track plays pretty much anywhere. 

It’s essentially about a man who can be found in “da club” wherein all of his wildest dreams can be met, regardless of the financial predicament it may place him in. But, fuck it, lest we forget; this is Fiddy. 

Fiddy does what Fiddy wants. 

It’s a track that promotes everything your Mum told you was bad for your health…. Ecstasy? It’s in there. Excessive consumption of alcohol? It’s in there. Putting the Rap game in a choke hold? While she may not have mentioned this, it stills finds its way in. 

Big tune.


Trampoline – Tine Tempah

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Veering slightly away from the early 00s trend, we have Tinie Tempah who spells both parts of his name incorrectly. Tiny Temper does insinuate that he’s a highly choleric individual in a way that Tinie Tempah does not, impressive. Regardless; on to the track. 

While this may not be my cup of Colombian finest blend, from working behind the bar I’ve seen so many people go bat shit mental when this song gets dropped it’s untrue. 

People lost to its spell include countless middle aged white folks, kids barely able to lift the drink in their hands and the ever famous “table whores” that love to shake what their momma gave them, erm, banger?


LALALA – Naughty Boy Ft Sam Smith 

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I’m not entirely sure I’ve met anyone that doesn’t really like this song. I’ve met people that aren’t keen, but no one seems to vehemently hate it. It combines this growing craze for UK garage music with Sam Smith’s delicate and soulful vocals which produce a hell of a track that people just love. 

The best thing is; it covers all the bases a club song should. This track has enough of a rhythm for anyone to dance to as well as being just chill enough to stand around and talk.

Oh, it was also one of 2013’s longest staying songs in the Top 10. It remained in the lofty echelons of the UK charts for nearly 3 months, which is a long time by today’s fickle standings. 


Monster – Kanye West ft. Jay-Z, Rick Ross, Nicki Minaj & Bon Iver

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There’s something about this gif of Kanye being really impressed by magic that appeals to me on so many levels. It’s great to see a gayfish/genius/cultural icon/all around tosser have such a human reaction to magic. It almost makes him seem like he’s just one of us, don’t you think? 

He isn’t though. 

For all his short comings, Kanye still produces some tracks to back up some of his more outlandish claims. This one from 2010’s My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy featured, arguably, the best verse on the whole album from Nicki Minaj. When we juxtapose this to how fucking terrible “Super Bass” and “Starships” are it’s a shame she doesn’t just permanently collaborate with Kanye on everything.


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