You Will Only Ever Do These 14 Things When Drunk
There are just some things in life that you need to be drunk for. These are usually the things we all wish we could do sober, but aren’t brave or stupid enough to actually follow through.
So to help you along your drunken way, we’ve put together our official “drunken bucket list”, a list of things everyone has to or will only ever do when drunk at least once, whilst intoxicated:
Well, until the photos get sent to you the next morning and suddenly all is clear.
6. Do A Table Dance
Your moves are on the money, people are looking and that’s how you know you’re good. Okay okay so you get a tad carried away thinking you are the next JT with your smooth moves, but it all seemed verr logical at the time. By jumping up onto the table you could ensure everyone in the club saw your twerk / merk (male twerk… that’s a thing… right?!)
8. Come Up With An Amazing Money Making Scheme That You Write On A Napkin Only To Lose.
Sometimes the napkin turns up and you’ll be forever left wondering why there’s a bunched up bit of loo roll in your pocket with the words “hot-dog vending machine” written on it.
12. Go On An Insane Adventure… End Up With Weird Bruises You Can’t Explain The Next Day.
“Dude what happened”
“You tried to have sex with a tree, but don’t worry, you fell off before you went all the way”.
13. Leave An Answer Phone Message You’ll Instantly Regret
Nothing seems like a better idea 3 minutes before you pass out than to tell your long term crush exactly how you feel about them. But a text just isn’t embarrassing enough, no no, because then you’d be able to use the “haha my friends stole my phone and text loads of my contacts” line.
But drunk you wants to make sure sober you can’t get out of this one… so a voice-mail it is.
14. Hair Of The Dog
Everyone has woken up the morning after with a glass by their bed, mouth feeling like the Sahara and taking the chance, knowing full well that there’s a 50% chance it’s vodka. A game only for the drunken brave.