Let Me Explain What The New Snapchat Update Really Means For Everyone
If you weren’t already aware, I’ll let you know last week, everyone’s favourite photo sharing app Snapchat (aka Nude Sender aka “my nipples will disappear in 5 seconds”) announced a new update and it’s something of a game changer.
We received this press release from Team Snapchat all about these updates. To be fair to them its pretty straightforward but it’s our duty to make sure the people truly understand. As a billion dollar company they maintain respectability at all times.
Whilst us, on the other hand, well we don’t give a f*ck. So let me break down the juicy bits and help explain what these new developments really mean for all 40 million of us Snapchat user
Snapchat – “When we first started working on an application for sharing disappearing pictures, we had no idea how much we would learn.”
What They Really Mean – “We had no idea you horny bastards would make us all rich off disappearing selfies, dick-pics and late-night nude shots. Cheers guys.”
Snapchat – “We also learned that conversation feels better when it’s visual”
What They Really Mean – We also know that most of you would rather see someone instead of having to read through their crap (shots fired @ Twitter). When a shallow follow means you have to scroll through airhead tweets for the rest of your days, it kinda stops being fun.
Snapchat – “So we decided to make sure that every time you launch Snapchat we take you straight to the camera. It’s the fastest way to capture and share a moment on your smartphone”.
What They Really Mean – We know the game, sometimes you need to take a cheeky snapshot as quickly as possible. Imagine you had to log in and go through different sections before you get down to business, then we’d miss out on all this
Snapchat – “We felt that Snapchat was missing an important part of conversation: presence…We could not be more thrilled to announce Chat”
What They Really Mean – For some of us a few words is enough to work our game. For those that are still struggling…this is for you! If this doesn’t work then nothing will!
Thank you Snapchat, thank you!