Your Other Half Is Off To Vegas This Summer? Here’s The 10 Reasons Why Your Relationship Is Officially Over
If the thought of going out on a Friday night gets us through the week, the prospect of living it up abroad somewhere for two weeks in the summer gets us through the year.
It feels like our lives revolve around plans made for summer and when that time finally comes, it’s a chance to let go of all the strains and pressures that come with everyday life. And that’s exactly what hoards of us will be doing this summer when it comes to our summer holidays, whether that’s a week with the girls in Ibiza or a trip to Las Vegas with the Lads.
Vegas, known for its nightclubs, casinos and general encouragement of outlandish behaviour, is a major tourist hotspot for those looking to ‘relieve’ some stress.
But what happens when that person is your boyfriend or girlfriend? Can you really trust them to remain faithful in the home of debauchery?
The short answer is no, no you can’t.
If your partner’s off to sin city this summer, your relationship is pretty much over and here’s why…
1) He’s blown your wedding fund at the casino.
Vegas’ favourite pastime is gambling. The rich and famous flock to the Nevada capital to sample its world famous casinos in the hope of getting that bit richer and if they don’t, it has no effect on their lives. Except you’re not rich or famous. You’re barely on minimum wage and every single spare penny you have is going towards the wedding fund so that you can give your girlfriend the day she’s been dreaming about since she was seven. She’s not going to be happy when she finds out that, despite your drunken best intentions to in fact double the wedding kitty, you’ve lost it all by putting it on red. You idiot, it’s over.
2) They’re now pretty much addicted to gambling
Not content with blowing your wedding fund out the window, your other half now has a full blown gambling addiction. It’s serious. You can’t sleep at night without fear of the bailiffs knocking down your door. And that’s if you still have a door, because they’ve put you into so much debt that you might not have a roof over your head for much longer. Nobody wants an addicted gambler as a partner, before you know it you’ll be part of the deal. Get rid.
3) They’ve had one too many drinks and got married
Gambling away your cash in one of Vegas’ famous casinos is one thing but if your partner fulfills another of Vegas’ rituals and gets married then your relationship is certainly over. It sounds far-fetched but plenty of people get hitched in Vegas for a laugh and are left searching for an annulment the morning after. You’ve seen Ross and Rachel right?
4) Strip clubs and dollar bills
Sorry ladies but the lure of a strip club is often too much to resist for a red blooded male without his other half in tow. Vegas is jam packed with strip clubs and his mates are pressurising him into going in. He tried his best to come up with an excuse but he can’t lose face in front of his mates and now those very same mates are uploading photos of him with his hands all over Mercedes from South Carolina. Your partner’s not going to be happy and, unless you’ve got the grovelling skills of a pro, it’s over.
5) Supersize Me
The nights in Vegas may be heavy but so is the day time. The strip is lined with hundreds of all-you-can-eat buffets and nothing’s more appealing on a hangover than food indulgence. If it becomes a regular thing, and I bet you it will, your girlfriend will be more Michelle McManus than Michelle Keegan when you pick her up from the airport. If that’s the case, throw In the towel.
6) They’ve started referring to their mates as ‘the Wolfpack’
It seems like every person that goes to Vegas gives you an annoying reminder of their trip by referring to their friends as ‘the Wolfpack’. They weren’t in any of the three Hangover films and your boyfriend doesn’t look anything like Bradley Cooper. It’s annoying and they need to realise it was just one flipping holiday. It’s over.
7) Vegas is a singleton’s paradise. They will cheat on you
And it’s not even because they wanted to…it”s just because there was too much temptation, well that was their excuse anyway.
You knew that singles flock to Vegas to party and where’s there’s alcohol there’s bad decisions made. Unless you have no conscious and the ability to cover your tracks like an MI5 agent then well done, you’re single again.
8) Every conversation begins with “When I was in Vegas”
You were happy for them to go on their little two week trip to Vegas because you didn’t want to be that guy/girl. But that was under the pretense that the holiday would be exactly that and that they wouldn’t go on about gambling every single time Deal or No Deal comes on.
Now, all they ever do is talk about places in Vegas or stories from Vegas and you’re not going to put up with it. Get out.
9) No hotel will ever be good enough now that they’ve stayed in the Bellagio
They’ve cheated on you, they’re fat and they’ve got a gambling addiction. To top it all off, now nothing will ever compare to the Bellagio where they didn’t even stay but went in to use the toilets. Every hotel you ever stay in again will be tainted, not because it’s not a nice hotel, but because it’s not the Bellagio.
10)Your partner will dump you after you fly out to meet them to cure your F.O.M.O
The fear of missing out (F.O.M.O) can often have a negative effect on decision making. When your partner leaves for a fortnight of fun that they’ve been planning for nearly a year, you can’t help but want to go with them. In a moment of madness, you think it would actually be a good idea to fly out and meet them. Imagine, the best holiday ever just got even better! Except it didn’t and now your partner resents you for not allowing them their space. In fact you’re a bit of a creep. It’s over.