We refuse to believe this is a child - Xclusive Touch

We refuse to believe this is a child

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Having come across the photo above on Twitter it’s hard to believe that the manboy in question is of school age. Everyone remembers  what it was like coming back from the summer holidays and having a friend a foot taller. What never did happen however and I’m sure you would agree is a friend come back after those blissful 6 weeks as a fully grown man, a man that would at the very least make it to the semi final stage of the World’s Strongest Man competition.

Having spent as much time chuckling to myself every time I caught a glimpse of my RT as wondering why it is that this beast of a man finds himself wearing a school uniform, has a rucksack in tow and presumably a child oyster-card in pocket.  A few logical explanations soon sprung to mind

1. He’s been selected to go undercover

selected to be undercover, gangster

It’s possible that the man in question works for her majesties secret services. He has been sent under cover to South London’s gritty streets and is forced to infiltrate a notorious gang, gain the trust of the olders on the block and bust a dangerous drug ring. If you’ve seen 21 Jump Street you’ll know this a possibility. 

2. He’s gone back to school

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After arguing with his teenage son who’s decided that; his science teacher is a wanker, will no longer attend his lessons, that GCSE’s are too hard and that all he really wants do is to enter world strongest man contests like his father. He decides to take his place his for a day to prove to his disillusioned son just how easy school is. His screw face is indicative of the fact that exams aren’t a piece of piss and that Mr Fox (the science teacher) was indeed a wanker.

3.Trick or Treat

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The photo was clearly taken on the 31st of October. The gentleman in question was pictured on the bus en route to have his make up done before heading to a Halloween party. A friend should have told him that he doesn’t pull of pupil very well and he would be better of going for something like teacher or crazy professor. Perhaps even an evil fairy (or whatever that is above). Sometimes you really have to be cruel to be kind.

4. He’s a future ‘Super Eagles’ captain

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It’s highly probable that he may have the same agent as players such as Obafemi Martins, Nwankwo Kanu and Jay Jay Okacha. If so we expect to see another up and coming talent fail to reach the dizzy heights that were expected at youth team level.

5. He actually is a child

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This obviously is the least likely of all the above options. It is however a possibility. As children everyone’s parents would remind them to eat all of their vegetables so that they would grow up to be big and strong. This young man obviously took note.





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