Rumour Has It, Ladies Prefer A Late Night Spanking To Snuggling - Xclusive TouchXclusive Touch
spooning cuddling snuggling couple

Rumour Has It, Ladies Prefer A Late Night Spanking To Snuggling

When guys say: “do you want to come over and watch a movie” we all kind of know that it actually means: “do you want to come over and get it on whilst The Notebook plays in the background?”

Just like when a guy says “do you want to get out of here?” he actually means “do you want get out of here and get it on?”

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Women on the other hand are kind of different. Not in their desires but in their ability to express them.

Till now it has been believed that men and women’s interests vary massively when it comes to after dark activities. Not entirely true. We’re just slightly less obvious with our “getting you into bed” tactics.

Ashton Kutcher boner No strings attached men flirting gif

I’ll admit wearing face-masks and eating cream cheese bagels in our onesies is clearly not working in the come-on department. I can’t imagine why men aren’t getting the hint. So in hopes of keeping the loving alive, I’d like to set a few things straight.

First of all, we are not all obsessed with “snuggling”. That’s actually just our code word for sex. And there’s more…

What she says: “Hug me”
What she means: What rhymes with hug me…
Robin Thicke What Rhymes With Hug Me GIF

I suppose Robin Thicke was right after all. Though don’t let him know we said that.

What she says: “Lets snuggle”
What she means: “Lets get it on”
How I met your mother barney marshall bang gif

If you think about it, “lets snuggle” is basically us saying “lets spend the next hour in bed rubbing our bodies together”. From there, make of that what you will.

What she says: “Spoon me”
What she means: “Fork me”
Friends with benefits justin timberlake mila kunis one night stand sex gif

I think you get the jist.

What she says: “I’m cold”
What she means: “…I think I need you to warm me up”
Spooning Boyfriend Snuggles GIF

If a girl is complaining that she’s cold, whilst wearing 2 pairs of socks, a jumper, a bath robe and slippers then she’s just cold. Leave her alone and go get her a hot water bottle.

If she’s wearing little more than underwear and is trying to use you for “body warmth” then I’m pretty confident in saying that she’s not cold at all, (though raising both your body temperatures is something she has in mind).

What she says: “I’m not interested in a serious relationship right now…”
What she means: “I love you. Lets have sex”
Charlotte sex and the city fucked sex gif

Women know that many men have a fear of the “post sex cling”. Which is basically where women sleep with a man and then automatically consider them to be their boyfriends. So they lie to get you into bed.

Oh don’t look so shocked. When it comes to lying to get people into bed, I think the male species is definitely on a whole different playing field, so allow us this one.

What she says: “Shall I send you a pic?”
What she means: “Look… remember how hot I am? Good. Now come over”
red bra blonde gif selfie picture hot sexy sex flirt gif

I’m not even talking filthy pictures here. Because, well, you don’t need me to explain those to you. But I assure you her “in bed with no makeup.. while actually wearing make up” selfie was perfectly staged with undertones of “I know you want me” and “my bed has room for two you know”.

What she says: “Hug me”
What she means: “Spank me”
gwyneth paltrow sex kinky wet hugs dating gif

Thank you Gwyneth. Perfectly put.

and lastly…

What she says: “Lets watch a film!”
What she means: “Ohhh, according to Twitter The Princess Diaries is on channel 4…”
Lazy sofa watch movie unbrushed hair gif

Sorry. Don’t rush out to buy condoms just yet.

Although since you’ve already put your jacket on feel free to go fetch a share size pack of cheesy Doritos for the movie…



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